Getting Involved

I've been at this long enough to experience plenty of interactions with parents that go something like this: "Robby, my son or daughter is going through ________. What should I do?"

First I would like to commend any parent who does this. It shows so much care and humility to go to someone else for help when you realize that you do not have the answer yourself. Too often we think we have all the answers, or worse yet, too often we are embarrassed to let others in on the fact that we have issues. The truth is we all have issues. They're nothing to be embarrassed about...they're something to seek help for both from God and from others.

Most problems we face don't have simple answers, and there is no one-size-fits-all answer to most problems because every person and every situation is different. There is, however, one piece of advice (besides prayer) that I have found to be very beneficial in helping parents deal with issues related to their teens...get involved in their lives.

Find out what they like. Get to know their friends. Find out what their passions are. Find out what really makes them upset. Ask them what honestly goes down at their schools. Watch shows that they like. Listen to their music. Doing these things shows that you care about who they are and what is going on in their lives. And doing this gives you the weight to have the guidance and direction you give them mean something because it is coming from someone who cares about them.

When you get involved in your teens world, don't forget to discuss issues of faith. No matter how much or how little you know about God or the Bible, conversations about faith are something that teenagers need...especially from their parents. If this is something new to you I wanted to give you a tool to help in the process. Each week at REALife I have been giving out what I call "The Daily Dose of Awesome." These are short and simple follow up readings and questions related to what we are discussing during our services. The students will have these at their disposal, and starting this week I will put the same sheet on the "Parent Resources" of our website for you to download. Feel free to use these as a means to foster discussion with your son or daughter about their faith. I hope they are a help for you.

I don't know yet what it's like to be a parent of a teenager, but I do know a lot about a teenager's world. So much of the effort you put in now may not show positive results until years down the line. But please take heart, and know that God sees the effort you put into raising your children, and He will be with you in the process.

Deuteronomy 6:4-9
Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one. Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.