REALife Parents

New Days Resolution

2012-01-11T18:15:00.000-05:00

We stared 2012 with such great intentions. We were fired up... passionate... ready to make 2012 something far greater than anything we've ever experienced before. But by now we've all had enough time for it to happen. We've missed a day. We've forgotten. We were just too tired. We messed up again. However we word it, the resolution we wanted to define 2012 is gone and we're not even two weeks into the new year.

I'm not writing this to discourage you. I want to propose a different perspective on resolutions.

Proverbs 24:16 says "The Godly may trip seven times, but they will get up again. But one disaster is enough to overthrow the wicked."

God is not a "one strike and you're out" kind of guy. It's so encouraging to read in the Bible that God already knew that we would fail, we would mess up, we would sin. This verse in Proverbs is not an isolated passage. God in His infinite wisdom knows that life is tough and we may trip up.

High school students know what it's like to trip up too. They get bad grades on tests. They wreck the car. They spill on the carpet. They lose things. I don't have high school aged kids of my own, but I'm around them enough to know that, for the most part, they tend to have something in common. I have parents ask me why their son or daughter doesn't talk to them about their problems, and I can honestly say that most teenagers I talk with don't go to their parents because they don't want to disappoint them, not because they are scared.

Now let's go back to Proverbs. I find it interesting that the Bible describes a person as "Godly" who messes up seven times. In my mind, that adjective doesn't fit in this context. But to God, what's important is not whether or not we trip up. What's important is whether we get back up again.

How can we encourage our students to get back up again? How can we be there for them? Encourage them? Give them space and freedom to make a mistake but being close enough to help pick them back up again?

So to all who have already tripped up on those resolutions... Today is a new day. We don't have to wait until 2013 to make a new resolution. Resolve right now to get back up again, and tell your son or daughter how "Godly" they are when they do the same.

A Great Team For Ministry

2011-11-28T12:32:00.001-05:00

I am approaching my five year wedding anniversary. I have had the blessing for the past five years to be married to by best friend. While marriage has it's ups and downs, I can look back over the past five years and thank God for what an amazing gift He has given me in my wife.

For the past five years, my wife Melissa has been the most consistent and encouraging supporter of my ministry. She not only cheers me on, she also pulls up her sleeves and volunteers for many hours each week on top of her regular work hours. She does this mainly in service to God, but also because she wants to support me.

Recently, I've been able to put in some extra volunteer hours for her area of ministry with the infant ministry at Meck. I was able to help her with an infant dedication that took place at our church (if you have a newborn or are expecting you should definitely look into this). I was able to help with some art, printing, set-up, and a few other tasks. The dedication was a huge success and went very well. We were eating lunch afterwards, when I was just overwhelmed in thinking about our lives together. I looked at her and said, "we make such a great team for ministry." And we do. We support each others passions. We build each other up. We encourage each other. And we are able to accomplish so much more together than we could ever possibly do on our own.

The reason why I am writing this is because in our new series we are talking about being a part of something bigger than ourselves. Melissa and I feel called to be a ministry team to do the work that God has put before us. God has also given you a team. He's given you a family, and together you can achieve things that you couldn't possibly do on your own.

I want to encourage you this month to see your family as a team for ministry. Get your family together and see how you can encourage each other towards deepening your faith and applying God's truth to your lives. Hebrews 10:24-25 says "And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching."

Whenever we are able to work together as a team it is amazing how much we can accomplish and how much are drawn together. This month, think about a project that you and your family can do together so that you can be a part of something bigger than yourselves. If you regularly give to Meck or a charitable organization, join as a family and talk about the significance of your gift. If you give of your time in service, think about doing it as a family and encourage one another in the process. Find something this month that you can do together that can show your family that you make a much better ministry team together than individually.

And if you are looking for some options, you may want to consider checking out one of the Serve Days at Meck. Check out our Upcoming Events for more details: http://mecklenburg.org/upcoming.asp.

Not Everybody's Doing It

2011-11-07T15:53:00.000-05:00

At REALife we have just finished our second installment of "The Battle Within" where we are talking about the topic of temptation. I was sitting in a small group of teenage guys last week when I asked them what were some of the biggest temptations they faced as high school guys. One of the top three things that they told me was the area of sex (pornography was second and "fitting in/peer pressure" was third). These are big temptations facing our students, but they are also areas where we can encourage them in their fight against temptation.

I've recently stumbled upon a report from the Center of Disease Control that studied sexual activity among teenagers in the United States (CLICK HERE to download the pdf). This report was eye-opening to say the least. I'll encourage you to check out the whole article if you have time, but here is one major highlight:

53% of boys and 58% of girls between the ages of 15-17 have never had a sexual encounter (including oral, anal, and vaginal intercourse)

Now let's re-visit my conversation with our high school guys. They're tempted by peer pressure to do what they think they have to do in order to fit in. They hear or assume that everyone in high school is having sex. So they are tempted by their peers (and maybe a little bit of hormones) to have sex. These temptations are very real and very strong. And this is where we can throw some encouragement at them.

Not Everybody's doing it. More than half of high school students in this age range are not having sex. Most students are waiting and holding out for sex. The biggest reason, as given by the report, for abstaining is on grounds of morality or religion. There are students just like them at their schools who are wading through the sea of temptation trying hard to follow the path that God wants them to follow, and a majority of them are staying strong.

We need to encourage these teenagers to continue to pursue God in this area of temptation. We are promised in 1 Corinthians 10:13 that "No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it." God provides a way out when we are tempted. He is there for them in their times of greatest challenge, and as adults and parents of these teenagers we should be willing to lend a hand as well. Talk to your son or daughter about this article. Ask them if they are experiencing the pressure and temptation to be sexually active, and give them the encouragement and support the they need to resist temptation in their lives. Who knows... you may be the "way out" that God is providing for your son or daughter when they are facing temptation in their lives.

Temptation and Practical Application

2011-10-28T18:06:00.000-04:00

So this weekend marks the start of a new series at REALife called “The Battle Within…understanding temptation.” I want to encourage you to make sure your son or daughter is here for this series. Students face temptation on a regular basis. They are inundated with websites, images, words, movies, relationships, and so much more that can either drive them towards God or away from God. Unfortunately in the world of teenagers many of these things drive them away from God. We are taking a deeper look into temptation these next few weeks to see what it is, how it effects us, and what to do about it in our lives.

But during this series I need your help. I am teaching about overcoming temptation in our student’s lives, but I need you to help me practice this with your son or daughter. Are you ready for some practical application of helping them overcome temptation in their lives? Warning: this is going to be tough.

One of the biggest temptations that face a majority of our high school guys (and girls for that matter) is pornography. I want to encourage you to click on the following link and read how pornography affects the lives of men both now and in their future relationships. Share this article with your son AND DAUGHTERS… girls struggle with this too, and if your daughter doesn’t struggle with it she will eventually date or marry a man who has struggled with this temptation.

CLICK HERE for the Link

And here are some questions to aid in your conversation with your son or daughter. As you enter this conversation, remind your son or daughter that you love them no matter what, and encourage them to be real with you. Here you go:

Do you currently view, or have you ever viewed pornography? When, where, and how did this happen? (Wow! Can you imagine yourself being this direct? In my years of youth ministry I have learned that being direct is the only way to get a direct answer.)

Is this something you currently struggle with, and if so can I help you overcome this temptation in your life? (FYI Parents… ask me if you need direction on installing parent protective software on your computer)

What did this article teach you about the dangers of pornography?

What steps do you need to take to ensure that pornography doesn’t destroy your life?

And one last word of encouragement from the One who can help us conquer any temptation that comes our way:

1 Corinthians 10:13

“No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to us all. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.”

Camp High

2011-10-18T13:09:00.000-04:00

Imagine this...

You are a teenager. You go away for a weekend with a bunch of your closest friends. You're separated from your computer, your TV, your video games, your homework, your hectic schedule, and the rest of your regular world. You take part in four different worship services where you praise God and hear about how to make Him a bigger part of your life. Your friends and other leaders at camp encourage your faith non-stop for about 50 hours straight. Say hello to the Camp High. This is the feeling where the only thing that matters to you is God. The only thing you want to do is worship. The only book you want to read is the Bible. The answer to every question is "Jesus." You get the picture. It's an amazing feeling, and you hope that it never ends.

Then you go home.... back to the same computer, same TV, same video games, same homework, and same crazy hectic schedule you always had. This wane in spiritual enthusiasm is tough on high school students. They miss the excitement, and they start to feel bad that they don't have the same passion for God that they had at camp. Right now is about the time our students will be feeling this way. We took a large majority of our students to our Fall Retreat a little more than a week ago, and that Camp High is about to dwindle.

That's where we come into the picture. While encouraging the church in Thessalonians 5, the Apostle Paul writes to them "Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing." Our students need us to encourage them in their faith. The Camp High is not designed to last forever, but students need to have that encouragement in their faith from adults and parents who care about them. We can't let them move from a world where they get that encouragement non-stop to an environment where they don't get that encouragement at all.

So let's take Paul up on his advice, and let's intentionally start a spiritual conversation with a student today. Let's encourage them where we see God working in there life and challenge them to give Him more of their life. Let's give our students a reminder of the Camp High as a way to encourage them to grow closer to the God that didn't just stay at camp, but is with them every moment of every day.

Expectations

2011-09-28T10:14:00.000-04:00

Luke 9:57-62 As they were walking along, someone said to Jesus, “I will follow you wherever you go.” But Jesus replied, “Foxes have dens to live in, and birds have nests, but the Son of Man has no place even to lay his head.” He said to another person, “Come, follow me.” The man agreed, but he said, “Lord, first let me return home and bury my father.” But Jesus told him, “Let the spiritually dead bury their own dead!Your duty is to go and preach about the Kingdom of God.” Another said, “Yes, Lord, I will follow you, but first let me say good-bye to my family.” But Jesus told him, “Anyone who puts a hand to the plow and then looks back is not fit for the Kingdom of God.”

I was reading through this passage of scripture above and God really made me realize something. If I say that I want to follow Jesus, He has an expectation for what that means. I mean sure I know what I think it means to follow Jesus, but is my expectation of "following" the same as His? He expects me to give of my time, effort, energy, resources, and more when I follow Him, and I shouldn't expect to give any less than what He is asking of me.

This is a lesson that relates to us individually, but I also believe that it relates all too well to teenagers. We have expectations for our teens. We expect them to go to school. We expect them to do their homework. We expect them to be polite and courteous. We expect them to clean up after themselves.

Time for the gut check... Do we expect them to be investing in their relationship with Jesus?

If you answered "yes" to that question, let me ask you another one. Do they know that you expect them to be investing in their relationship with Jesus?

Teenagers are very smart. They learn all too well what is important to us, and they will work hard at meeting the expectations of their parents. In addition to "have you done your homework" and "have you cleaned your room" do we ever ask "have you read your Bible or prayed today" or "how did you demonstrate God's love to others at school today"? These are things that Jesus expects of those who follow Him, and as adults (and parents) you can help reinforce those expectations in the life of your son or daughter.

There are two main ways that I want to challenge you in this lesson.

First, set these expectations for yourself. Are you involved in/attending church? Are you reading your Bible and praying daily? Are you intentionally living out your faith in an obvious way to others? Are you expecting to do these things in your life? This has to be real to us before we can make it real to them.

Second, talk to your son or daughter about these expectations you have for their life. Show them that God is the most important thing to you, and tell them that you expect Him to be the most important thing to them. Make sure they know that you will be asking them more regularly about their faith, then actually follow through with it.

And some encouragement as we wrap this up... We should expect for God to do amazing things in our lives when we do what He expects us to do.

Are You Up For A Challenge?

2011-09-19T16:45:00.000-04:00

Romans 10:14-15 tells us:
^"But how can they call on him to save them unless they believe in him? And how can they believe in him if they have never heard about him? And how can they hear about him unless someone tells them? And how will anyone go and tell them without being sent? That is why the Scriptures say, “How beautiful are the feet of messengers who bring good news!"

Paul writes these words in Romans almost two thousand years ago, and they still ring true today. But lately I've been thinking about it in terms of how to apply this truth to high school students. Yes, students need to hear the gospel that Christ came and paid the price for their sins so that they can go to heaven. And yes, we need to tell them about this amazing truth. But to a high school student, is that enough? In my opinion, I don't think so.

The longer I am in student ministry the more I realize how much students need to see a living example of what following Jesus looks like. They need to see their parents and other adults they respect eager to attend church each weekend, passionate about inviting their friends, hungry to spend time with God daily outside of church, and committed to living their lives for Jesus before these students will truly understand what following Him means for their lives. "How can they hear about him unless someone tells them" can more accurately relate to high school students when put "how will they know He means something to them unless you show them that He means something to you?"

Students need to see that Jesus should invade our entire lives... our families, our jobs, our finances, our hobbies, our language, everything. It will only be then that students will begin to see that God means something to them in their lives.

So, are you up for a challenge? I want us all to take a little inventory, myself included, and ask ourselves these questions:

_How often are topics of God and faith discussed in my family?

_When was the last time I asked someone how I can pray for them?

_When was the last time I spent time with God outside of church (and is this a consistent thing)?

_With the exception of church on Sunday, would my life be any different without Jesus?

Chances are, if we can't confidently answer these questions, our students can't either. As adults, let's set an example for our students to follow. Let us be able to tell our students what Paul tells us in 1 Corinthians 11:1 which says "follow me as I follow Christ." Students are looking for someone to show them that God means something to them. Will you be that person?

Challenge extended. Will you accept?

Parent Meeting

2011-08-15T14:50:00.002-04:00

Just a reminder... our REALife Parent Meeting is this Tuesday at 7 P.M. at our North Charlotte Campus. Come here about our new school year at REALife, ask questions, and find out how you can be involved with our mission to reach the thousands of high school students in the Charlotte area. Dessert will be provided, and please RSVP to let us know you will be attending. Click Here to register.

Discussion on Homosexuality

2011-07-29T08:58:00.003-04:00

This week our Senior Pastor Jim White has been posting biblical insight into the topic of homosexuality. I am sorry I didn't think to link to this sooner, but you can catch up on all of these by heading to his blog by CLICKING HERE. This is an important topic to discuss with our students, as this issue is constantly drawing more and more attention.

Summer Events Reminder

2011-07-11T16:42:00.002-04:00

Next Monday, July 18, we've got our second edition of our Student Ministry Summer Nights service. Our first one broke all our former records of attendance and rocked the house. We hope to see even more students this time come to hear the word of God being preached, so encourage your son or daughter to be there and to bring a friend. You never know how much impact one invitation can have on someone when God collides with their life.

Other event reminders:

Lake Day - August 6
Summer Nights - August 22

S'CAMP Highlights

2011-06-28T11:16:00.002-04:00

We got back from S'CAMP last Friday, and it's taken me that long to recover to be able to write this post. We had an awesome time at S'CAMP. We got to see God move in amazing ways. A large percentage of our group made re-commitments in their faith while several others made first time commitments to Christ (some of whom we have been praying for for long time). I also had the privilege of baptizing eleven students on this trip! Our whole experience was so deep spiritually, and on top of that it was truly amazing socially as well. Students were encouraging each other on in the faith. Age barriers were broken as Senior and Freshman and everyone in between found ways to break down the barriers of cliques to unite as one church family. I must say I was blown away at the amazing love I saw displayed by our students for each other as well as their love for all of the other groups at the camp.

These kind of trips are so unifying for our student body. It really does unite us and helps us build momentum towards personal spiritual growth as well as outreach to those who have yet to experience the love of Jesus. Please keep praying for our students and our ministry as we will seek to use this energy to reach Charlotte teens with God's love.

And by the way... our dates for our Fall Retreat are October 7-9. Mark your calendars.

A Specific Ask

2011-06-14T15:06:00.002-04:00

Following up to my last post about serving, I want to check in with some of you parents to see if you can give a little bit of time to the student ministry this summer. Our middle and high school ministries are combining for one big service each month, and we are in need of people to help with some set up. These services will be meeting on the Mondays of June 27, July 18, and August 22. We will be doing most of our set up on the Sunday afternoon the day before each of these meetings. The approximate time we need help will be from 12 P.M. to 1 P.M. after our last morning service on Sunday. If you feel a desire to come help us out, please send me an email to let me know and I we will be in touch with you soon to let you know more details.

Serving this Summer

2011-06-07T14:34:00.003-04:00

It is a high priority of mine to emphasize serving in the lives of our students at REALife. There is so much to be said for developing a life of prayer and meditation on God's word. These are such essential pieces of our spiritual lives, but so often that's where most people stop. I like to try to instill in our students that the Christian life is meant to be lived as evidence to the love of Jesus that we have received. The book of James chapter one verse twenty-two also tells us "Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says." When the Bible tells us to love God and love our neighbor as ourself, these are not commandments to "feel" love for people, but to live it out in our lives.

At REALife we do this in two ways. We encourage our students to get involved at Meck serving in one of our ministries. We have so many areas where we are in need of volunteers at all of our campuses. From guest services to MECKidz and the arts team there are plenty of areas where they can get involved. We also go outside of the walls of our church to serve somewhere in the community once a month. The reputation of our students precedes us, as the workers at places like Crisis Assistance and Second Harvest Food Bank always tell me that our group has so much life, energy, and love.

Why am I telling you all of this? Well, this summer I'd like to encourage you as parents to serve along side of your son or daughter. If you are not already serving at Meck in a ministry, talk to your family and see where you all might want to give of some of your time at Meck to help us towards our mission of reaching people with the love of Jesus. If you know of a place you would like to serve as a family, or even have more questions about it you can contact our director of connections, Kati Leach, at kleach@mecklenburg.org and she will connect you with a ministry leader who will get you serving right away (and if you want to serve at REALife, just let me know. I'd love to have you on the team).

There are also several opportunities each month to participate as a family in our monthly serve days at Meck. This is a great opportunity for students and parents, as we also encourage our REALife students to join up on these Serve Days through the summer instead of scheduling our own. For information about these Serve Days or to register head to mecklenburg.org/events for more details.

More Summer Dates

2011-05-26T09:47:00.003-04:00

Below is the REALife summer calendar that you should expect in the mail next week. All the extra details of each event will be available on our website www.mecklenburg.org/realife.

This weekend marks the last REALife service of the school year before we start our summer programming. It really has been an awesome year. We've seen more spiritual and numerical growth than ever before. We had our highest attended Fall Retreat and will have our highest attended Summer Camp in REALife history. We've got more REALife volunteers pouring into our students than we've ever had (but we still need more if you're interested). We've moved our REALife service into our main auditorium to handle our growth. And this is all just the beginning of what I know God is going to do in and through our ministry. God is inspiring some creative ideas in our leadership to implement throughout the summer and into the fall, and I can't wait to share it with you. But for now, it will have to wait.

With as much as we are doing at REALife I do want to stop and thank you so much for all that you do as parents in the lives of your son or daughter to encourage them in their faith. We have one and a half hours that we spend with your student, but you are the biggest influence of faith in their lives. Keep up the hard work of investing in their spiritual lives, and know that I am praying for you.

Summer At REALife

2011-05-17T14:42:00.002-04:00

Let me start off with a praise report. This year will mark the largest attending S'CAMP (summer camp) in REALife history. I am so pumped and ready for the fun and the amazing life change that will happen on this trip. Please be praying for our students and staff as we prepare to head down to camp in June.

...and on that note, we did have one female student drop out of camp, leaving one open spot for one female student. If you know of a student who would like to pick up this spot please let me know. First come, first served.

And our summer calendars will be sent out next week along with the website being updated, but I just couldn't wait until then to throw some dates at you for some of our awesome events we have coming up. Check these out, and mark your calendars. We're looking forward to a great summer.

"Summer Nights" Services: June 27, July 18, August 22

All-Nighter - July 8

Lake Day - August 6

Easter at Verizon

2011-04-18T11:39:00.002-04:00

Just in case you haven't heard, Meck is holding our Easter service at Verizon Wireless Amphitheater. We've been planning this for a while, and it's going to be an amazing service. Check out the website for the event by CLICKING HERE. This really is a service you don't want to miss. With egg hunts and bounce houses for the kids and NEEDTOBREATHE performing for the adults, it's going to to be fun for all ages.

Also, I just wanted to remind you that we do not have REALife on Easter, April 24. Celebrate the resurrection of Jesus together as a family.

2011-04-13T09:31:00.002-04:00

I recently found this website called University Parent Connection (http://www.universityparent.com/). This site helps parents prepare for their student heading off to college and gives tips on how that relationship can grow during those years. This site recently posted the following article, and I though I would share it with you. I hope you enjoy it, no matter what stage of high school your son or daughter is at .

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Tips for Supporting Your Student

Stay Connected

Support your student by staying connected. Communicate via phone, e-mail, IM, cell phones, SKYPE, and ‘snail’ mail. Students love to get real mail, especially care packages. Expect that your student will not respond to all of your contacts, but know that he or she appreciates hearing from you.

Checking-In

Give your student the opportunity to share feelings and ideas with you. He or she is experiencing new viewpoints and perspectives that may challenge prior belief systems. Allow your student to explore ideas without being judgmental. Understand that changes in viewpoints, behavior, dress, eating and sleeping habits, and relationships with parents are all to be expected during the college years.

However, if you suspect that some of these changes may be signs of bigger problems (alcohol or drug abuse, academic problems, etc..), refer your student to the Counseling and Psychological Services office. Trust your instincts. Your student may need you to refer him or her to the appropriate resources for help.

Be Knowledgeable About Campus Resources

Utilize parent resources, such as the school website or read any parent calendars, catalogs and handbooks provided by the University. These resources are designed specifically for parents and provide a great deal of information about the University and its departments. Helping your student to navigate a large university by referring him or her to the appropriate resources is one of the best ways for you to mentor your college student during this transition to adulthood.

By acting as a referral source, you can demonstrate that you are interested in your student’s life at the University, and at the same time, you empower your student to solve his or her own problems.

Continue to Have Difficult Conversations

As a parent of a college student, you no longer have the same control that you once had. However, you do still have a tremendous influence on your son or daughter’s behavior. In college, your son or daughter will have to make their own decisions including what time to get up in the morning, when to study, when to exercise, whether or not to drink alcohol, how much alcohol to drink if any, and whether or not to engage in sexual relationships. While you cannot force your student to behave exactly as you would want them to, parents can share their values and beliefs with their students on these topics.

Studies show that parents influence their child’s behavior regarding drugs, alcohol, and risky sexual behavior even after their child leaves for college. Provide your student with the facts on these issues, and empower them to distinguish between good and bad decisions when it comes to their behavior, health, and safety.

Create an atmosphere of open communication, and your student will not only appreciate that you respect him or her as an adult, but he or she will also be more likely to turn to you for guidance.

Ask Questions — But Not Too Many

Most first-year college students desire the security of knowing that someone from home is still interested in them. Parental curiosity can be alienating or supportive depending on the attitudes of the persons involved. Honest inquiries and other “between friends” communication and discussion will do much to further the parent-student relationship.

Expect Change

Your student will change. College and the experiences associated with it can effect changes in social, vocational, and personal behavior and choices. It’s natural, inevitable, and it can be inspiring. Often though, it’s a pain in the neck.

You can’t stop change, you may never understand it, but it is within your power (and to you and your student’s advantage) to accept it. Remember that your son or daughter will be basically the same person that you sent away to school.

Do Not Tell Your Student That “These Are the Best Years of Your Life”

College can be full of indecision, insecurities, disappointments, and most of all, mistakes. It’s also full of discovery, inspiration, good times, and exciting people. It may take a while for students to realize that their Hollywood-created images of what college all about are wrong. Hollywood doesn’t show that college is about being scared, confused, overwhelmed, and making mistakes.

Students may feel these things and worry that they are not ‘normal’ because what they’re feeling is in contrast to what they’ve been led to believe while growing up. Parents can help by understanding that the highs and lows of college life are a critical part of your son or daughter’s development, and by providing the support and encouragement to help him or her understand this as well.

Trust Your Student

College is also a time for students to discover who they are. Finding oneself is a difficult enough process without feeling that the people whose opinions you respect most are second-guessing your own second-guessing

One more thing from me that this article did not have...

Never stop praying for your son or daughter, and never stop investing in their spiritual development.

Proverbs 22:6 "Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it."

REALife Summer

2011-04-12T20:57:00.004-04:00

For starters, this is your official reminder that the S'CAMP registration deadline is this Sunday, April 17. This is an amazing trip, so make sure you get your son or daughter registered. CLICK HERE to head to our events page and register now.

Also on the way is our REALife summer schedule. We break from regular REALife schedule for the summer, and during those months we alternate between REALife services, events, hang-outs, and service projects. We've got a lot of great plans and events, so stay tuned for our REALife Summer Flier on it's way to you soon.

S'CAMP

2011-03-31T09:20:00.002-04:00

It's official. Registration for S'CAMP is now open. If you haven't heard, S'CAMP is REALife's summer camp... the most awesome week of summer for many of our students. We head down to Myrtle Beach for five days of the beach, fun, and amazing worship. To register your son or daughter head over to the events page of our website by CLICKING HERE. S'CAMP is also open to high school students outside of REALife, so have your son or daughter bring a friend. Space is limited, and registration ends April 17th.

More on the Dangers of "Sexting"

2011-03-27T10:05:00.002-04:00

I've written about this issue before, but teenagers are still dealing with this issue. Today's Charlotte Observer draws more attention to the dangers of "sexting" among teenagers. Check out the article here: http://tinyurl.com/6lbbcm9.

If you haven't addressed this topic with your son or daughter by now, it's time to do it now.

Jamaica 2011

2011-03-17T10:21:00.004-04:00

For the past three years Meck has been partnering with Won by One ministries to bring a team down to Harmons Jamaica from our church. While we often think that Jamaica is just a tropical paradise with beautiful sand beaches, the truth is that most of the people on the island live in extreme poverty. Harmons is a village in the interior of the island, and this village along with the surrounding villages are some of the poorest areas in Jamaica.

Needless to say, we're taking another group down this summer to serve the people of Jamaica. This trip is open to everyone at Meck over thirteen years of age, and each year we try to get as many REALife students on this trip as possible. I will avoid giving all the details here, but you can find them on our website by CLICKING HERE.

What I will tell you is that this trip is a life changer for all our students who attend. We get to experience the love of Jesus first hand as we serve some of the poorest of the poor in the world. This trip benefits the people of Jamaica in amazing ways, and also inspires all of our groups who have participated. I've been on this trip three years running, and each time we come back I see a group of Meck people who's lives are changed in amazing ways.

So check out the website above. If you have any more questions please free to ask. The registration deadline is the end of March. And check out these pictures from last years trip.

Mating, Dating, & Mating Week 1

2011-03-08T10:30:00.004-05:00

Our Waiting, Dating, & Mating series has begun, and let me tell you... the energy in the room this past weekend was off the charts. Students were so engaged and eager to hear about this topic of sex that is so prevalent in the culture all around them. This is a topic that really interests them and one they truly want to hear about. Students are hearing about sex from friends, from school, from social media, and from so many other outlets, but these sources of information don't hold the same weight as the Bible. Those other outlets don't usually move past discussing sex as an action based on physical urges, but the Bible speaks to much deeper questions about sex, like 1) how should we view sex? 2) is there a right and wrong time and place for it? and 3) are there moral implications for going at this the wrong way? As we continue this series, let's keep the conversations going with our students to help them establish a Christian mindset for how to approach this important topic.

Among other lessons from this past weekend, I challenged our students with two things:

First, I challenged them to step back and consider how they are speaking to the opposite sex. Our students live in a very sexualized culture. They are surrounded by people who use sexually explicit language as a means to put people down, coerce sexual activity, or merely make a joke at another person's expense. The language that our students use can contribute to treating others this way, or their language can stand out as words of love, care, and respect that exemplify the love of God. At REALife we brought up Ephesians 4:29, that we are "not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen." It's important to realize that the topic of sex should not be isolated to the physical act itself, as we can see that even our language can get wrapped up in this topic as well.

Second, I also challenged our students in the area of pornography. This is a serious issue that a large percentage of teens struggle with. Matthew 5:27-28 tells us "You have heard that it was said, 'You shall not commit adultery.' But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart." Pornography objectifies those involved as the people being viewed become objects of our fantasy instead of human beings created in the image of God. As Christians we are called to a higher view of humanity than that, as we believe that people are created in the image and likeness of God.

From here let's see how you can help lead your son or daughter in these areas. I would encourage you to sit them down and have a conversation with them about these issues. This shouldn't be just a passing question on their way out the door. Really set some time aside and ask them some serious questions: "How do your friends treat the opposite sex?" "Explain to me what it means to treat others the way God wants us to treat them?" "Do you struggle with pornography?" We also need to understand that while this topic really interests them one of the biggest fears teens have is disappointing their parents for mistakes they've made. When you approach your son or daughter with these questions be sure to make it clear that you will love them and help them through any issue they are facing. Opening up this line of communication may be difficult at first, but establishing this kind of openness will greatly help you be able to speak God's truth into the life of your son or daughter.

Please contact me if you need further direction when navigating through this topic with your son or daughter. And know that I will be praying for you.

Waiting, Dating, and Mating

2011-02-28T17:05:00.005-05:00

This weekend we're starting our annual reoccurring series called "Waiting, Dating, and Mating." This is a relationship series designed to discuss what the Bible has to say about issues related to sexuality. I know that when a youth ministry presents these types of topics, parents can start thinking a couple of things that are a little off-track from the goal of this series. Let me speak to both of them here.

The first thought of some parents might be "Yeah, the church is talking to my son or daughter about sex... so I don't have to." That thought couldn't be further from the intention of this series. It is my desire and goal for this series to open up the lines of communication between parents and students. I want students to go to there parents with their questions and struggles about relationships, and I believe it is the parent's primary role to lead their children to follow God in this area of life. We are taught in Deuteronomy 6 that we are to impress God's teachings onto our children, and this doesn't exclude God's guidelines for our sexuality. My challenge to you as parents is to have a conversation with your son or daughter after every service to find out not only what they are learning, but also what they think about what they are learning as well. You may also find other conversation starters throughout the week by downloading our Daily Dose of Awesome on our website (mecklenburg.org). These are follow-up readings about the topics we discuss at REALife, and are great ways to keep the conversation going with your family throughout the week.

The second thing that comes to mind with some parents is "Sex is not something to be discussed in public. Why should we be talking about this at church?" Here's my answer to that question. Students hear sexual messages and see sexual images on a regular basis. All one has to do is walk through the halls of a high school for less than a minute to hear that sex is a major part of students lives. It's what they talk about. It's what interests and intrigues them. It's what the media is feeding them. And for the church to remain silent on an issue so entrenched in teenage culture is huge mistake. Plus, the Bible is full of valuable information for our lives in relation to sex, so why not discuss what the Bible has to say about it?

And let me reassure you of what this series is not... It is not an anatomy or sex education class. We are not discussing "how it all works", but rather how it all relates to God and our faith. So, if you have never talked about sex with your son or daughter up to this point in their lives, I would recommend having a conversation with them before they attend this series. This will better help prepare them for what we will be discussing.

So, let the conversation begin. And please contact me if you care to discuss in more detail the topics being covered, or if you have any questions related to how to handle this topic with your son or daughter.

Serve Days

2011-02-14T14:26:00.003-05:00

When most people hear the word "church" they think of a building where you meet on Sundays. This is a common understanding of this word, but in reality the word is much more significant than just a building. In the Bible the word church is used to describe not just a building, but the people of God. It's not only important to understand this; it's important to live this out as well. When the people of God, His church, live out their faith and love for Him they are being a living demonstration of God's presence in this world. No building can do that... it requires God's people to act on their faith in their lives.

That's why once a month at REALife we gather together to head outside the walls of the church building to show our community the love of God. We call these events "Serve Days" and they happen one Saturday every month. Our next Serve Day is this coming Saturday, and you can get more information about it on our website by CLICKING HERE. All high school students are welcome to attend. Parents of high school students are also invited, but not required to attend. Our hope is that through these events the love of God would spread outside the walls of the church and into our community, and that these Serve Days that happen once a month would inspire lifestyles of service that will really make a difference for Jesus in this world.

Reaching Out

2011-02-14T13:37:00.005-05:00

This week I have been inspired through the preparation of our REALife service that is geared towards helping our students reach out to those who don't know Jesus. In my thoughts and prayers I was reminded of a certain mom of a student in our ministry. Almost every week she goes out of her way to pick up at least one of her son's friends to bring them to REALife. I think it is such a witness to our mission at Meck to see someone so willing to reach out (and help her son reach out) to the people around them. Seeing this mom give these rides week after week made me re-realize a very underestimated ministry tool... the free ride. An invitation to church is great, and we should be inviting our friends to church. But if that invitation is followed up by "and I'll pick you up at 6:30" it goes that much further. This offer to pick them up counteracts a few major deterrents from attending church. With your offer to pick them up they now have to put zero effort into looking up the address and directions, they have to spend no money getting there, and they don't have to worry about not knowing anyone when they arrive because you are with them. This makes a huge difference to a first time guest of our church. This is something that we can apply to our lives as adults, but it is something that is even more important with high school students. If your son or daughter asks a friend to come check out REALife, in addition to the obstacles mentioned above they have to battle an even bigger obstacle than most of us face as adults... their friend most likely doesn't have a car and their parents will not drive them to church. The student who may want to say "yes" knows that he or she can't get there, and the valiant efforts of our students to invite them are stopped in its tracks.

So what do we do? First, let's remember our mission to help people become followers of Jesus. As a church we are dedicated to doing all that we can to help reach people with the love of Jesus that can transform their lives. Next, we can put that mission into action. If your son or daughter already drives, encourage them to offer their friends rides to REALife. And if you are the one who drives them to REALife have a conversation with your son or daughter to let them know that you are more than willing to pick up their friends to help get them to REALife. And think about it this way... five to ten extra minutes of driving could impact the life of a high school student for eternity. This is what I will be challenging our students with this weekend, but it's a message we all need to be reminded of from time to time.

On a similar note, I also understand that we have some parents out there who are in need of some help getting their son or daughter to REALife, especially now that our church is spread so wide over several different campuses. If you are interested in carpooling with other families in your area, send me an email to rsmernoff@mecklenburg.org that tells me: (1) your name, (2) address or general area, (3) number of students needing rides, and (4) the best method to contact you? I cannot promise you that we will find someone to carpool with in your area, but we can at least see if we can make it happen.

God is Not...

2011-02-10T12:09:00.004-05:00

We're starting a new series at REALife this weekend. It's called "God is not..." and through this series we are going to take a look into three commonly held misconceptions about God. This will be a three week long series, and you can keep up with it through our follow-up readings to every message. CLICK HERE to go to our "further study" section to download those follow-up readings.

This week we're taking a deeper look into the phrases "I think God is..." or "To me God is like...". So often we hold views about God or hear views about Him that are more based on opinion than on God's word. We have to realize that just because we think God is a certain way, doesn't mean we're always right. God is not everything we think He is. We have to go back to the Bible to make sure that our views on God are founded on His truth, not simply our conjecture. I hope that this series will help students come to a more accurate understanding of who God is by dispelling myths about Him, and that we can also move on from this series with a greater appreciation of God's Word.

Pastor Jim White's Blog

2011-02-03T09:54:00.004-05:00

For those of you who do not know, our senior pastor Jim White updates a blog weekly that discusses issues of faith and culture. All of his posts are worth a read, but today's post especially hit me, as it is a topic that relates so much to what teenagers (and adults) struggle with...being angry with God. Check out the link below, and if you desire to receive updates from this blog when they are posted you can click the "subscribe" button on the lower right side of the page.

Church and Culture Blog

Jeremiah 29:13

2011-01-31T10:56:00.002-05:00

This week at REALife we discussed how there are common misconceptions that many people have about Christianity. So many people consider Christianity to be just a list of rules. Others consider Christianity to be a checklist of things to do... as though Christianity only involves going to church, reading your Bible and being a good person. While those things are at times included in Christianity, that is not what it's all about. Christianity is about pursuing a relationship with the God that deeply and passionately loves us. When we see God as a list of rules or Christianity as just a checklist of things to complete in a week we severely miss out on a truly amazing relationship that has the power to transform our lives. Christianity is a relationship to pursue... not an obligation to keep.

This past weekend at REALife I challenged the students to this understanding of pursuing a relationship with God. Our passage of scripture was Jeremiah 29:13, where God tells us "you will seek Me and find Me when you seek Me with all your heart." This verse tells us two very important things. First, God wants to be pursued by us. This verse is a relational declaration from God. He is calling us to seek Him. He is calling us to pursue a relationship with Him as we would a relationship with someone we truly love.

The second thing this verse tells us is that this relationship with God isn't always easy. But let me ask you a question; is any relationship easy? From my experience with relationships, if you don't put time and effort into it, it is going to be shallow at best, but most likely it will grow to be non-existent. We can expect nothing less from our relationship with God. If we're not pursuing Him and putting in the effort that relationship will die.

So I gave the students three ways to pursue this relationship with God: regularly practice a quiet time with God, engage in conversation about God with others, and continuously think about Him and His word. These are three ways that we can all grow to pursue God better in our lives. As we move forward with our year at REALife, these points will be ones that I encourage in the lives of our students, and I pray that you as parents will join in or continue on in this effort.

One way you can keep up-to-date on the topics we cover at REALife is by downloading our "Daily Dose of Awesome." This is a resource I create for students each week to help in their daily devotional life. It has daily readings that relate to the topic we cover at REALife, and is great for helping students relate what we are teaching to their daily lives. This resource is available to you to download on our website, so please click that link and check it out.

I know this could possibly be a new topic for some of you. Pursuing God as a relationship is different than what some of us might be used to. If this is a topic for which you would like more direction as it relates to your son, daughter or even yourself, please feel free to email me at rsmernoff@mecklenburg.org and we can discuss this further.

Super Bowl Party

2011-01-26T16:48:00.002-05:00

We're having a Super Bowl party for REALife. It's Sunday February 6th, and it will last from 6pm until the end of the game. Your son or daughter may leave or get picked up before the game is over if it is running too late.

We'll be providing soda, pizza, and the game on the big screen at the church...all for free. So encourage your son or daughter to bring a friend, and we'll see them at the party

In Honor of MLK Day

2011-01-17T21:27:00.002-05:00

I came across this quote from a sermon by Dr. Martin Luther King from January 1965. He delivered this message to his congregation in Montgomery Alabama during some of the most difficult times in the movement towards Civil Rights . This inspired me when I read it... I hope it does the same for you.

God’s control is never usurped. If at times we despair because of the relatively slow progress being made in ending racial discrimination, let us gain new heart in the fact that God is able. In our sometimes difficult and often lonesome walk up freedom’s road, we do not walk alone. God walks with us. God has placed within the very structures of the universe certain absolute moral laws. We can neither defy nor break them. If we disobey them, they will break us. The forces of evil may temporarily conquer truth, but truth will ultimately conquer its conqueror. Our God is able.

Summer Camp

2011-01-03T21:14:00.002-05:00

Good news for those of you who plan your summers early...

We already have our dates for S'CAMP (REALife Summer Camp). We're heading back down to Myrtle Beach June 20-24, so mark your calendars and get ready for the best week of summer. More details coming in Spring.

Media Insight Part 1

2010-12-01T11:50:00.004-05:00

Instead of doing one long blog post about how to help parents navigate the world of social media, I decided it would be better to split it up into segments. Here's part one of this series.

I taught a class session at Meck about a year ago focused on boundaries with teenagers. My role was to provide insight on the issues related to technology. While researching, thinking, and praying through what to teach in that class the first thing that I felt prompted to remind parents is to TAKE BACK THE ROLE OF PARENT. Let me tell you how I related this to social media and technology.

When we were teenagers we didn't have the internet, Facebook, and Youtube. We didn't have cell phones and smart phones. We didn't have video games connected to the internet. Let's face it...teenagers probably know more about all this stuff than we do, but that doesn't mean they should have the right to use these devices any way they choose. We need to be aware that some of media being consumed by our teenagers is unhealthy, and they need to be guided by parents to help them filter out the bad from the good. Here are a couple a short reasons why we need to think about all of this:

1) Proverbs 22:6 tells us "Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it." It is God's desire that we guide younger generations to live for Him. I know it is so much easier to turn the other way. We think that we'll choose our battles and this doesn't seem to be that serious. If we can learn anything from recent news about the lives of teenagers it is that this is a big deal. Cyber-bullying, sexting (sending naked pictures of yourself or others via text message), and the mass quantities of easily accessible internet pornography are just a few reasons why our teens need guidance facing the challenges of media.

2) Many teenagers have split personalities...one in real life and one online. I've gotten to know so many high school students in person, and then I am completely surprised at the alter-ego I see from them online. It's two completely different people. We may believe that certain teens are doing fine and seems like a great person, but their online life tells a different story about what is really going on in their hearts.

So what should we do? I will go more into specific detail in future posts, but to start things off... try to be a part of their world. Listen to your child's music, watch their television shows, randomly check their text messages, read television show and movie reviews, become their friend on Facebook, read their blogs...basically get to know what is influencing your son or daughter and what image they are portraying online. This is a big first step in helping guide your child towards Godly living in these areas.

So where's the push-back? What are some of our excuses why we don't I'm sure there are more reasons than this but I wanted to speak briefly to a couple reasons why parents don't

1) It's too much work. I'll be honest...it is a lot of work. Raising a teenager is a lot of work, and raising them to follow God is even more work. Technology is advancing faster than we can keep up. And if I am unable to monitor everything my child does, then why try? The answer to that question is another question: is your son or daughter worth the effort?

2) What about my child's privacy? Here's what I have to say to that question? It is not their computer, their cell phone, their internet, their television, and their music if they didn't pay for them...they are yours. Monitor, limit, and maybe even eliminate entirely what your son or daughter is accessing technologically. Limit how often they are online and where they access the internet (it's a lot more difficult to look up pornography in the family living room). Monitor what websites they visit. Set up expectations and boundaries.

Now before going to the extreme and exhibiting full fledged iron fist control, think and pray through what steps you need to take because if your child is not used to your presence in this area of your life you may need to ease into this slowly They may think it's unfair, but as we end this let me tell you what I think would be more unfair. It would be unfair to allow someone to walk into something that's going to hurt them when we know better and can do something about it. It would be unfair for us sit back and withhold advice based on our maturity and experience that would be beneficial to teenagers simply because it might stir the waters a little bit. God has given you a great responsibility in raising children. Let's look to Him for strength and guidance and take back the role as parent in the lives of teenagers.

I hope this was helpful. May God bless you as you navigate the world of teen culture.

Media Monkeys 2 & 3

2010-11-22T13:46:00.002-05:00

Sorry for lagging on the post from last week. I'll combine our two messages into this post here.

At REALife we have been taking a look into the messages that we hear from media outlets such as music, movies, television, magazines, and internet. This has been a great series to help students really question the messages they are hearing in the media and compare them to the messages that God wants us to hear.

Last week we talked about the unrealistic expectations we receive from movies and television. Think of the television shows that portray high school students, such as Glee, Gossip Girl, and High School Musical. The actors that are supposed to portray high school students, ages 14-18 years old, are actually more often in their mid to late 20's. So while actual high school students are struggling with developing bodies, acne, voice change, etc., the "high school students" they see on TV and movies are not struggling with any of that...because they are 25 years old. This may not sound like that big of a deal, but think about how actual high school students can respond to these unrealistic portrayals: "My body doesn't look like that...what's wrong with me." "Why do I have acne when no high school students on TV have it?" Our teens are being fed unrealistic expectations of what they are supposed to look like and who they are supposed to be. It is important for us to acknowledge the truth that the phase of life they are in is normal. God created them the way that they are, and they shouldn't compare themselves to actors on TV who are older than they are.

This past weekend we took a look into consumerism in the media. While adults are often times tied down with how to spend their money due to house payments, bills, and other expenses, teenagers have more discretionary income. Teenagers are more likely to spend their money on food, clothing, and entertainment. Marketers are well aware of this, and are targeting much of their advertisements to teens and children (check out this new way to see a $30,000 car through this form of advertising: http://tinyurl.com/3969orl). Media outlets bombard teenagers with advertisements in hopes of grabbing the allegiance of a consumer at a young age . While advertising is not bad in itself we have to be aware of the effects that advertising can have on our teenagers. How many of you have seen an advertisement and thought "how much better would my life be if I had that?" So often we get the idea in our head that we will be happy once we get _______, or our life will be so much more complete once we buy______. Jesus tells us in Matthew 6 that our possessions here on earth are going to fade away. In the very consumerist society we live in it is important to teach our teens that true joy and happiness isn't found in the things that we buy, but in a life lived for Jesus.

At the beginning of this series I intended to incorporate some insight for parents about social networking sites. The series turned a slightly different direction, but check back soon for details that can help you better understand how to engage your son or daughter's use of social networking.

Media Monkeys

2010-11-08T14:15:00.003-05:00

As you may already know, we started a series this past weekend called "Media Monkeys." The point of the series is to identify some of the messages that we hear from the media and compare them to the messages that God wants us to hear.

This weekend we talked about the media's portrayal of religion. Topics of spirituality are pretty common in music, movies, television, and print. It is important to help our teens identify the messages they are receiving and compare them to God's Word to see if they are accurate. Now, there are so many different messages that we hear from media sources all the time. It would take quite a while to address and explain them all. Here are a few of the ones we touched on at REALife. Use these as a launching point to talk with your son or daughter about the messages they are hearing from the media. As we found at REALife this past weekend, this is a topic that really gets students talking.

Here are three of the messages we hear from the media...

1) God doesn't matter - Remove "Christian" movies and music from the conversation and think about the movies/music/tv shows that you watch. God and Christian values are not popular topics of conversation in media outlets. What message does this send to teenagers? From my perspective, it sends several messages: a) God isn't important, b) God isn't interesting, c) God isn't fun... basically to summarize these messages, God doesn't matter in my life. If God isn't important enough to sing about, if He isn't important enough to bring up in television or movies, if He isn't a part of the lives of celebrities in People magazine, then why should He be a part of my life? The absence of God in media is a subtle message that is playing itself out in very un-subtle ways. Our teens do not feel like God matters because that's how the media portrays Him. This is not the message that God wants us to hear. As parents and Christians we need to show teens that God means something to us.

2) Faith doesn't impact my life - There is a common duality in the world of celebrities that is portrayed to us through the media. Teens see a celebrity who they know sings about drug use or promiscuous sex, but at the VMA's (video music awards) they first would like to thank God for this great achievement. The message that we hear from this is that faith plays no real role in my life. The message we hear is "yes I'm a Christian, but that isn't going to change the way that I live." This, again, is not the message God is telling us. God wants to transform out lives, and it's important for us to identify what actions demonstrate obedience to God and what actions push us farther away from Him.

3) God is something that He is not - When God is represented in the media, He is usually misrepresented. For instance, a recent episode of the television show "Glee" played off the not so new phenomenon of finding the image of Jesus burned into a grilled cheese sandwich (a grilled "cheesus"). The character on the show named Finn proceeds to pray to this Jesus image to ask for things that he wants (to win a football game, to become quarterback again, and interestingly enough for sexual progression with his girlfriend). This episode was in no way pushing the understanding that God is in a grilled cheese sandwich (it seemed more like a joke than anything else), and the bigger issue I saw was the common understanding among teens to only go to God when the want something. To many teens, God is a cosmic vending machine whose only purpose is to give them what they want, and when they don't get what they want it proves to them that God isn't there. When the media portrays God to be something He's not, it's important to talk with teens about the truth of who God really is to combat inaccurate messages they would otherwise believe.

I hope that these few points start to get you thinking about what messages our teens are hearing from their media sources on a daily basis. Let this be a wake-up call to all of us to speak to teens about these messages they are hearing, and let's try to bring the truth of scripture into the conversation. Stay tuned in the upcoming weeks for more posts related to media, teens, and faith.

Lost Childhood

2010-10-25T11:49:00.002-04:00

Lately I've been reflecting on the messages our teenagers are receiving from a wide variety of media sources. These messages come at our students from all angles, both obviously and subliminally. I have been planning a new series for the past couple of weeks designed to shed light on these messages that our students receive on a regular basis. I'm calling it "Media Monkeys," and during this series I will be showing clips from popular movies and tv shows, showing clips from magazine covers, playing sections of today's popular music, and discussing some of the downsides of the internet. This series is designed to point out the lies we hear from these media sources as well as discuss how to see God's truth and beauty through these sources as well. I will be updating this blog weekly during those weeks as well as providing other tools and information for you as parents to be informed on these issues. So stay tuned...

And along those lines our senior pastor Jim White put out a blog post today on the topic of "Growing up Younger." This post discusses the movement of our culture that pushes kids to move to adulthood at a much younger age. It's a great read. Check it out by CLICKING HERE.

bullying

2010-10-12T19:11:00.003-04:00

I just recently read the following article about bullying. It is so sad to think that there are students out there who are ridiculed on a regular basis. Please read this article and think about three things:

1) how can you speak God's love into the life of your son or daughter's to help combat any ridicule and bullying that they might be experiencing?

2) how can you challenge your son or daughter to stand up for other students being bullied?

3) how can you use this article as a way to speak to your son or daughter to ensure that they are not a part of this problem?

Please be praying for our high school students...they need God's love in their lives.

Click HERE to view the article

CHURCH

2010-10-04T10:45:00.003-04:00

Every once in a while I get the question... "is REALife ever going to switch times to meet during the adult services?" This is a great question, and let me let you know my thoughts on this...

Having our high school service along side of our adult weekend services would be like killing two birds with one stone right? I mean that would make things so easy. The adults get their service and the students get their service and there's no more driving back to the church to get kids to REALife. While I understand that simultaneous services would make things easier on family's schedules I believe there is far more benefits to our current situation, and here's a big reason why:

I highly encourage you to attend weekend services as a family. High school students are at a place where they can really relate to adult issues, and those issues are actually a big part of their lives. Just think of the topics pastor Jim covered this past month... anger, patience, perseverance, favoritism, and making our faith a part of our lives. In my opinion every high school student needs to hear about these topics. And it is so highly beneficial for the family to attend together. This allows for faith based conversations to more easily flow through the family and provide more opportunities for family unity (not only attending together, but possibly serving at a service together, eating a meal together before or after the service, etc.).

So what, if any, is the value of students also attending REALife if they already attend an adult weekend service? Great question. There are several aspects to our REALife services that I feel are highly beneficial for the life of a high school student. Let me address a few of them here:

(1) Our content is directly relevant to high school life. All sermons and content of the service is designed with a high school student in mind. We try to get into their world and show them that God can be a part of it.
(2) Our ministry is highly relational. We have 20+ adult leaders who are connecting with students to help them relate faith to their lives, discuss the issues they deal with, and show them God's love. Students thrive on these relationships, and are the way they best grow in their faith.
(3) Our services aim to foster an authentic sense of Christian community among high school students. Students need to know they are not alone. They need to see that there are other high school students who believe in Jesus, who struggle with tough issues, and who are just searching for answers. We hope to provide that community where students can connect with other students in a safe and welcoming environment.
(4) Our REALife service gives the students an avenue to practice outreach on their own. We challenge our students to tell their friend about Jesus and invite them to REALife. This is so beneficial for their faith now, but also helps give them practice for when they move on to college and beyond and need to know what it's like to grow in their faith without parental supervision.

So, I just wanted to put it out there. There is so much value to attending services as a family, and there is so much value in encouraging high school students to attend REALife to better help them learn how to grow in their faith for when they move on to be on their own. Please feel free to email me with any other questions related to this. Have a great day.

Baptism

2010-09-27T12:50:00.003-04:00

Before I update you on a very important topic, I wanted to let you know you can now download our "Daily Dose of Awesome" on the Parent Resources section of our website. These are follow-up readings that relate to the topics we cover at REALife, and they are a great resource to start spiritual conversations with your son or daughter. I hope you enjoy them.

Coming up the weekend of October 16 & 17 we will be having an all-Meck baptism. Baptism is a very important part of the life of a Christian. It is the visible expression of a life commitment to Jesus as Lord and Savior. In the Bible throughout the entire New Testament we see that every new believer was baptized as a symbol of the decision they have made to follow Jesus. In our current culture, many people have lost site of the value of baptism in the life of a Christian. If your son or daughter, or even anyone else in your family, is a Christian but has not been baptized I would strongly encourage you to look more into this event coming up at Meck. I would love to answer any more questions you might have about it, or we also provide a free cd where our senior pastor Jim White outlines a Biblical view on baptism and answers many of the common questions that most people have. Check out the following link for more information or to register. I hope to see you there. I'll be the guy by the pool cheering you on!

http://mecklenburg.org/upcoming.asp

Getting Involved

2010-09-22T09:30:00.002-04:00

I've been at this long enough to experience plenty of interactions with parents that go something like this: "Robby, my son or daughter is going through ________. What should I do?"

First I would like to commend any parent who does this. It shows so much care and humility to go to someone else for help when you realize that you do not have the answer yourself. Too often we think we have all the answers, or worse yet, too often we are embarrassed to let others in on the fact that we have issues. The truth is we all have issues. They're nothing to be embarrassed about...they're something to seek help for both from God and from others.

Most problems we face don't have simple answers, and there is no one-size-fits-all answer to most problems because every person and every situation is different. There is, however, one piece of advice (besides prayer) that I have found to be very beneficial in helping parents deal with issues related to their teens...get involved in their lives.

Find out what they like. Get to know their friends. Find out what their passions are. Find out what really makes them upset. Ask them what honestly goes down at their schools. Watch shows that they like. Listen to their music. Doing these things shows that you care about who they are and what is going on in their lives. And doing this gives you the weight to have the guidance and direction you give them mean something because it is coming from someone who cares about them.

When you get involved in your teens world, don't forget to discuss issues of faith. No matter how much or how little you know about God or the Bible, conversations about faith are something that teenagers need...especially from their parents. If this is something new to you I wanted to give you a tool to help in the process. Each week at REALife I have been giving out what I call "The Daily Dose of Awesome." These are short and simple follow up readings and questions related to what we are discussing during our services. The students will have these at their disposal, and starting this week I will put the same sheet on the "Parent Resources" of our website for you to download. Feel free to use these as a means to foster discussion with your son or daughter about their faith. I hope they are a help for you.

I don't know yet what it's like to be a parent of a teenager, but I do know a lot about a teenager's world. So much of the effort you put in now may not show positive results until years down the line. But please take heart, and know that God sees the effort you put into raising your children, and He will be with you in the process.

Deuteronomy 6:4-9
Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one. Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.

Meck Membership

2010-09-13T21:08:00.003-04:00

I posted a note on our Facebook page to our students about church membership at Meck. We have our membership class this weekend called "TEAMlife." If you are not a member, please see how the following note applies to you and your family. If you are already a member, but your son or daughter is not, I want to encourage you to talk with them about what it means to become a member at Meck.

-------------Facebook Note---------------

Hey REALife.

I love our high school ministry. High school students are so awesome, and I know that for you students its so great to have people your own age to hang out with and discuss issues related to faith. REALife is such a great part of my life.

But I believe very strongly that REALife is NOT a separate ministry in itself, but we are a part of our bigger church family, which we call Meck. The church is comprised of black and white, rich and poor, male and female, and young and old. It's not just the adults at Meck who can make a difference. REALife high school students have the potential to greatly influence the rest of the church and our city. Your energy, passion, and enthusiasm for God is contagious, and that is exactly what our church needs.

If you have been around Meck for a while, or even if you've only been around for a little bit and you just love our church, I want to strongly encourage you to think about becoming a member at Meck. Church membership is a person's way of acknowledging that Christianity is more than just themselves...it means being a part of a larger church family. It's joining a team of people united in reaching the city and Charlotte and the world for Jesus.

If you are interested in looking more into church membership at Meck, there is a class this weekend, Saturday Sept. 18 from 9am-12pm. Attending doesn't require you to become a member, but it does explain what it means in depth. Go ahead and check out the website below and look up the event details of "TEAMlife" which is our membership class. This link will also give you the option to register for the class.

I hope you check this class out. As a member of Meck for the past four years, I can tell you that I love being a part of something so much bigger than myself, and we would love for you to join the team.

http://mecklenburg.org/upcoming.asp

Can you hear me now...good.

2010-09-08T10:18:00.002-04:00

This summer proved to be an amazing time for fostering community within our high school ministry. It was amazing to go on Facebook and see how much our students continue to hang out with each other, even with less REALife events to keep them connected. I am seeing a beautiful sense of Godly friendship and encouragement happening with our students...I hope you are seeing the same.

I wanted to let you in on the secret to why I feel our students are connecting so much. It all has to do with S'CAMP this summer. Every Thursday night at camp I give the students time to express themselves. I give them a chance to stand up in front of their peers and tell them what God has showed them throughout the week. Every year this turns into such an amazing time of encouragement, but this year was off the hook. Students started sharing about their deep hurts, their biggest worries, their difficult situations, and their desire and need for God. It was truly a special time. But what made it all that much more amazing was that the students listening to the stories being told responded with love and grace. At the end of the time of sharing their stories a large majority of the students said that they felt like they were at this camp with family...that's how connected they felt to each other.

Why am I telling you this? I learned a valuable life lesson by witnessing this experience. Students want to be heard. Your son or daughter wants to be heard, and they want to be heard by someone who will listen and respond with love, grace, and encouragement. High School students are going through a lot. We may think "well, not my son or daughter...they have it all together." That might be the case but here are two things you need to think about. (1) Students are good at hiding A LOT of things from their parents. How much did you hide from your parents when you were their age? (2) Your son or daughter may be doing great, but they have friends who are struggling, and if their friends are struggling, your child will be hurting with them (they are super connected).

One last thing before I go...
Can you think about this question for me:

Is there any reason why your son or daughter would not want to talk to you about what is going on in their life?

This is a big question. Students are afraid of what their parents might think about them after they tell you what's going on. They're afraid of what you might do to them. They're afraid that you won't listen or won't understand. They're afraid...but they need you. They need to be heard, and, in my opinion, you are the best person for the job.

This takes time...it takes effort. If your son or daughter does not already talk to you about their life (serious issues...not just sports), then you will need to build that trust and reassure them again and again that you are a safe place for them to go.

You can do it. I believe in you, and I am praying for you.

Coping...or something like it

2010-04-13T11:11:00.002-04:00

Hey REALife Parents.

I included in my Parent email two weeks ago that we have started a new series called "Coping...or something like it." I am really excited about this series, and it has already given students an avenue to discuss their issues and the issues that surround them in their schools. We discussed drugs, alcohol, and tobacco this past weekend, and during our small groups the students had so much to say about just how prevalent these substances are all around them. This is a serious topic, and I can tell you from the stories that I've heard that our students need guidance and accountability. They need to hear from you just how important it is to say "no" to these things. They need help from all of us adults so that they can constantly hear how damaging these substances can be for their health and their future. And most importantly, they need our guidance to see that Jesus is the only thing that will fill any void that they have in their life, and that drugs and alcohol are only temporary solutions.

Talk to your son or daughter. Ask them directly if they are using these substances, and if they are please show them love and grace as you help them through quitting. And know that even if you are not talking to them about it, their friends and peers at school are talking to them about it. Hopefully we can have the voice of truth that they listen to in a world dominated by lies.

Please contact me if you need any additional resources in this area, or you may also contact our Meck Counselor, Kelly, at kstilwell@mecklenburg.org for further counseling.

Yet another Warning

2010-04-01T08:59:00.002-04:00

Recenlty I expressed my concern about the website formspringme (seen below), but another website has come to my attention lately that you need to know about. Chatroulette (http://www.chatroulette.com/) is growing in popularity and there are some real dangers with this site. This site works off of web cams and microphones, and you pretty much just click in and your connected with a random stranger. Like Formspringme, the site is completely anonymous, allowing the possibility for your son or daughter to be connected with anybody out there regardless of age and without any safety filter. This article explains a lot (http://tinyurl.com/yhpm8ak) but the friends that I know that have tried this site have seen naked people on the other end on several occasions. This is bad news.

www.formspring.me

2010-03-08T13:19:00.002-05:00

Hey REALife Parents.
Every once in a while there comes a trend among teenagers that makes me concerned. I am consistently seeing more of our students involved in this social media website "formspring.me". This site probably has it's positive features to it, and from what I've seen thus far it is used by our students as one of the many ways they represent themselves online. This site is a lot different than others like Facebook. On Facebook you know who is commenting on your wall or sending you messages. On formspring.me people submit anonymous questions to each other. Many of the questions are harmless, sometimes the questions are pretty stupid, and some of the questions I've seen are vulgar and inappropriate. The fact that these inappropriate questions are being asked to our students is wrong by itself, but combine that with the fact that our students have no idea who is sending the messages and this site becomes downright scary.

I would definitely advise for you as parents to ask your son or daughter about this trend. If they have a site, check it out and see the questions they are being asked (anonymously remember!) and the responses they are giving. I think this will be a big surprise to you.

Waiting, Dating, and Mating

2010-03-02T13:43:00.003-05:00

Hey REALife Parents.

As you may have learned through my email last week and from our website, we just started our Waiting, Dating, and Mating series at REALife. This series covers a wide variety of topics related to sex and dating. This past weekend was great. The students seemed very responsive, and my small group leaders have told me that their groups got to talk through some very good issues.

I wanted to encourage you to use this series to your advantage. If you haven't talked to your son or daughter about sex, use this time to do it. If you haven't talked to your son or daughter about sex in a while, use this series to revitalize that conversation. Students need continually guidance from you as parents, especially in this area that is such a huge issue among teenagers.

I know it can be awkward to discuss these topics with your kids, but know that they are hearing about it and talking about it with their friends, and having your guidance could really make all the difference in their understanding about the issues.

Here are some sample questions you can start with to get the conversation going:

-How much pressure do you feel among your friends or at school to have sex?

-What boundaries have you set up in regards to sex, and why did you set up those boundaries?

-Do you feel like you can come to me (the parent) if you break those boundaries, or even if you just want to talk to me about these things?

-Do you struggle with looking at pornography? (wow, this is a awkward question to ask, but this is a big issue, and approaching it with openness and grace can help your son or daughter through this issue)

Here's an outline of the topics discussed during this past weekend and over the next three weeks. Please let me know if you have any other questions. I would love to talk with you.

February 28 - Singleness, Sexual Language, Lust, Masturbation, Pornography, Forgiveness

March 7 - Dating, Boundaries, Respecting Others, Respecting Yourself, Forgiveness

March 14 - Sex, Boundaries, A Theology of Sex, The Beauty of Sex, The Dangers of Sex, Forgiveness

March 21 - Text Your Questions

A Students Virtual World

2010-02-08T10:49:00.004-05:00

Hey REALife Parents.
You are all well aware of the times we live in. We live in an age that is far more technologically advanced than we ever had when we were kids. Our students today are able to live in two different worlds...they live in the physical world with sports, school, family, and friends, but then they also live in a virtual world. Students today are able to create online identities. They are able to become anything they want to be through the way they represent themselves online. And here's the tricky part...often times you're son or daughter can be a completely different person in their virtual world than they are in the physical world. Soft spoken, shy students can be posting extremely inappropriate pictures of themselves online. Well mannered, highly polite students can say some of the most vulgar things on their facebook status update. Strong Christian students who read their Bibles, pray, attend Christian school, etc can be representing the complete opposite of that lifestyle in their virtual world.

I see this all the time. Students I know in the ministry who I believe to be seeking God strongly are completely lost online. It's almost as if students believe that what they type online does not count as it relates to their faith and their physical lives. We know that this is completely not true. What a student is posting online (pictures, comments, status updates, etc.) is a direct representation of what is going on in their heart. We need to be aware of this as adults who seek to guide our students towards God.

So here is my challenge to you. Monitor your students virtual world. When I see a student that I know post an inappropriate comment or picture I send them a private message asking them if they can consider what they did in relation to their faith. I suggest that you do the same thing with your son or daughter. They need this guidance. They need someone to help them think through their thoughts and actions in their virtual world just as much as their physical world.

A couple of tips:
(1) Get involved in your son or daughters virtual world. This may mean creating online accounts like twitter, facebook, www.formspring.me, and others (ask them what sites they are on) with the sole purpose of checking up on them. They may not like this, but it is your right as a parent to do this.

(2) Don't reprimand them publicly. Most social networking sites allow for public or private messaging. Don't call out your son or daughter publicly for the world (and their friends) to see, and make it known that you are questioning them privately because of your respect for them.

(3) Don't simply say "that was wrong and I want you to change it immediately." Help them get to the heart of the issue. I say something like these statements: "today you posted this___________. What happened to make you feel this way? Did you really mean that thing you posted, or was it impulsive? Why do you think I'm asking you about this post? Is that post something that truly represents the love of God for others to see? What can you do in the future to better deal with the feelings you had that made you post that? Have you considered deleting that post?

One last thing...I hope you know that even though confrontation with your son or daughter is difficult sometimes it is so beneficial. Try to push past that feeling to leave it alone and let it fix itself...it won't fix itself. We need to guide these students, and as parents you are able to help lead your son or daughter closer to God through these kind of interactions.

Why No Winter Retreat

2010-01-18T10:38:00.002-05:00

Hey REALife Parents.
I've had a few questions recently that has made me want to put out an explanation for all of you. The past two years I've had a Winter Retreat for REALife students where we've gone up to Boone and had a weekend of snowboarding, skiing, and fellowship. They have been great trips, but this year we will not be doing this trip for a few reasons. This trip is expensive, totaling in the mid $200's for one weekend because of lodging, transportation, lift tickets, etc. With the economy the way it is I want cancel this trip and encourage students to start saving for our summer camp, which is five days long for around the same cost. Second, because of the cost we rarely get the turnout that we like, so if we can have more than double the amount of students at our free REALife service on Sunday nights I would pick that over the retreat any day. I hope this explains things for you. Please let me know if you have any further questions.

FYI - S'CAMP (Summer Camp) is June 21-25. And it's gonna be awesome.

SCAMP Dates are Set

2010-01-12T09:17:00.002-05:00

Our Summer Camp dates have been set. We'll be heading back to Myrtle Beach June 21-25. More details will be coming soon, but I'm sure this information will be useful for those of you planning your summer vacations.

Ordering Your Private World

2010-01-06T11:12:00.002-05:00

Hello REALife Parents.
I hope that you all were at Meck for the first installment of "Ordering Your Private World." Pastor Jim is presenting a topic that I believe is much needed in our lives. We are a culture of outward appearance. We want to look good to others and make everyone think we have it all together. Because of that we always focus our resolutions on outward aspects of our lives while neglecting the real base of our problems...our inner world. More often than not, our external problems are only symptoms of the real internal problems.

I believe that this topic is crucial for our teenagers today. Our teenagers are growing up in a very distracting world. I interact with our teens and talk to them about their lives. Very few of them take the time to stop for internal reflection to order there inner world. Many students cannot sit for any extended period of time without whipping out their cell phone for a text or game. Many students express to me that they can't pray for a couple minutes without getting bored or distracted by something else. I believe that our students need to take the time to stop and order their private world. The biggest need in this process is stopping to reflect on God and their relationship with Him.

We have a great opportunity during this series to bring up these issues to our teens. We need to encourage them to be at these services. Then, we need to be in dialogue with them about their thoughts on these issues. There are some great questions we can be asking to help our teens think through these issues in there lives. Here are some examples of some starter questions, and hopefully these will spark conversations that help our teens reflect on there inner world and their relationship with God:

-What is going right in your life?
-What is something you wish was different?
-How would you describe your prayer/devotional life?
-What are you most proud of in your life to this point?
-What do you think are your top goals are right now, and what are you doing to reach them?

Let me know how it goes. I love to hear how students are applying these principles in their lives.

Fostering Healthy Development

2009-12-02T13:02:00.002-05:00

In my seminary studies I have the opportunity to glean from a variety of sources on topics of theology, church history, youth ministry, and many other topics. The book I am currently reading is called Hear My Story by Dean Borgman. I'm only in the beginning, but so far this book has already helped me so much in understanding youth culture and the situations they are facing today. This book is a great resource for those of you who want to dive more deeply into understanding teenagers, adolescent development, and all the problems and pitfalls that hit our students on a daily basis.

I just got through reading two chapters on growth, socialization, and fostering healthy development in kids during their formative years. Borgman cites several very interesting stories about children lacking socialization. For instance, two girls named Kamala and Amala in the 1920's were found in the jungle having been raised by wolves. These girls did not learn how to speak, how to interact with people, were not toilet trained, and were unable to perform several other aspects of socialization that children learn from parental figures in their lives. Borgman goes on to say that "these stories highlight the fact that animals live mostly by instinctive behaviors; human beings by learned behaviors."

This is a somewhat obvious fact, but while I was reading these chapters it really struck home with me how much influence parents have on their children. You help them learn to speak. You help them learn decision making processes. You help them learn to eat on their own. You help them learn what it looks like to be human.

You also have the same influence in your child's spiritual development. These students are looking to you as parents and adults to teach them about faith, model authentic Christian love, and demonstrate a genuine Christian lifestyle. You help them learn what it looks like to be a Christian. The beauty of this is that God designed it this way. Your children need you. Kids today need loving and caring adults to "train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it" (Prov. 22:6). Let's take some time to look at our lives and see how we can better raise this next generation to follow God and change the world through His love.

Get Involved!

2009-11-16T14:43:00.002-05:00

One of our biggest prayers that we have for parents of REALife students is that they can fulfill their roles as spiritual leaders of their families. That means engaging your son or daughter in conversations that relate to God and their faith as it relates to their lives, and guiding them towards living a Christian life. We hope to help you in your pursuit of these efforts, so please feel free to contact us for any advice, suggestions, or questions. Being the spiritual leader of your family is the BEST way to get involved in the ministry. See last week's post on how to incorporate the lessons we learn at REALife into the rest of your week.

In addition to leading your family towards following Jesus, there are still plenty of ways to get involved at REALife from becoming a relational leader to taking on a specific task for our ministry. There is always room for a parent to join our leadership team. We currently have a need for relational leaders, set-up team members, tear-down team members, and check-in team members. Please contact Robby Smernoff if you are interested in serving in our ministry or if you have questions about how you can get involved. (email: rsmernoff@mecklenburg.org)

REALife Sermon Follow-up Readings

2009-11-03T11:26:00.002-05:00

In case you didn't already know, at REALife we have taken this semester to go through the book of Mark in the Bible to study the life and teachings of Jesus. This is a great way to give students an in-depth look into how to relate the messages of this gospel into their lives. It has been a wonderful journey so far, and I hope and pray that our students are growing spiritually through this effort.

To compliment these messages we have developed additional readings that relate to the message shared at REALife. Each Monday we will post a document that is able to be downloaded from our website that gives extra readings for the five days of the week. These are short readings with just a few questions to keep the students thinking about what we are learning at REALife all week long.

As parents, feel free to download this reading yourself, but also encourage your teens who to download these readings and make them a part of their daily routine. I pray that this is a great resource to help students grow even when they are not physically at church.

Click Here to go to our website to download the readings.

Happy Halloween

2009-10-28T11:02:00.002-04:00

Happy Halloween Parents.

This holiday has it's pluses and minuses. There is fun to be had with friends, eating candy, dressing up, and hanging out, but there are also the darker sides to this holiday.

My suggestions about this holiday...

1_ Pray for your students...against temptation, for safety, to remember their God in all they do.

2_ Be informed...know where they are going, who they are with, who will be chaperoning, etc.

3_ Exert your parental authority...if you don't approve of where your student wants to go for Halloween, help them find something else to do.

Have a great week. God bless.

Great Start for REALife

2009-09-21T15:11:00.002-04:00

Hey REALife Parents.

Well, we've kicked off our fall, and it has been awesome to see what God is doing at REALife. We started the year off with 75 students! That's a huge answer to prayer. And this past week we saw 72 students. Please continue to pray for God to move through the high school students in this area. There are so many that need to be reached in the name of Jesus.

So here's one area where you can be a huge help. Encourage your son or daughter to invite there friends to REALife. Praise them when they do invite their friends. Offer to drive them or pick their friends up from their houses. Do what it takes, but encourage them to reach out to their friends. You can be a huge part of fostering that care in the hearts of your son or daughter and in training them to care for those who need to hear about the love of Jesus.

The Severity of "Sexting"

2009-07-16T21:53:00.000-04:00

The phenomenon of sexting is by no means new, but has received much attention lately as severe punishments are being given out to those who take or send naked pictures through text messaging. Please read this CNN article and talk to your teenager about the severity of the punishments for these crimes.

Click Here to read read the article

Using Less Paper

2008-07-25T11:08:00.001-04:00

Hey REALife Parents. To be a better steward of our resources we are increasingly trying to put more and more of our information on the web. This helps us save paper and reduces paper waste for you.

We will be sending out email and text reminders each week, and our online calendar will be updated regularly with all of our current information, so make sure you check your emails and our website.

Please email me you email address if you are not currently receiving emails from me: rsmernoff@mecklenburg.org.

Please go to our website at www.meckstudentminstry.org/realife to sign up for our text message updates (standard text messaging rates apply).

REALife Parents

New Days Resolution

A Great Team For Ministry

Not Everybody's Doing It

Temptation and Practical Application

Camp High

Expectations

Are You Up For A Challenge?

Parent Meeting

Discussion on Homosexuality

Summer Events Reminder

S'CAMP Highlights

A Specific Ask

Serving this Summer

More Summer Dates

Summer At REALife

Easter at Verizon

----------------------------------Tips for Supporting Your Student

Stay Connected

Checking-In

Be Knowledgeable About Campus Resources

Continue to Have Difficult Conversations

Ask Questions — But Not Too Many

Expect Change

Do Not Tell Your Student That “These Are the Best Years of Your Life”

Trust Your Student

One more thing from me that this article did not have...

REALife Summer

S'CAMP

More on the Dangers of "Sexting"

Jamaica 2011

Mating, Dating, & Mating Week 1

Waiting, Dating, and Mating

Serve Days

Reaching Out

God is Not...

Pastor Jim White's Blog

Jeremiah 29:13

Super Bowl Party

In Honor of MLK Day

Summer Camp

Media Insight Part 1

Media Monkeys 2 & 3

Media Monkeys

Lost Childhood

bullying

CHURCH

Baptism

Getting Involved

Meck Membership

Can you hear me now...good.

Coping...or something like it

Yet another Warning

www.formspring.me

Waiting, Dating, and Mating

A Students Virtual World

Why No Winter Retreat

SCAMP Dates are Set

Ordering Your Private World

Fostering Healthy Development

Get Involved!

REALife Sermon Follow-up Readings

Happy Halloween

Great Start for REALife

The Severity of "Sexting"

Using Less Paper

----------------------------------

Tips for Supporting Your Student